I constantly find myself wondering and worrying if I'm doing right by you two. It's a constant concern for us: Are we doing the right thing? Are we making the right choices? Is this all really in YOUR best interest? Parenthood is proving to be by far the hardest, most all-consuming, draining, greatest, and most rewarding experience of our lives.
We get such a sense of purpose when we see you two reach a milestone, achieve a goal, or just thrive as children your age should be doing. Those moments justify everything we've had to endure to get to this point.
We won't always seem like the best parents to you, I can guarantee that. I can guarantee that by the time you read this, we will have had hundreds of arguments and that more than once you'll think to yourself "Why did I get stuck with THEM?" Believe me, we've all been there. I also hope that long after you've read this, when you have a family of your own, you'll be able to understand where we came from.
Parenthood is hard. I mean, really, really hard. More often than not, I find myself second-guessing every choice I make regarding you two. I really do wonder how someone like me was able to produce such phenomenal human beings. You two are polar opposites, and sometimes it's a real challenge for us to know how to handle two very different children's needs. Do we always make the right choices? Probably not. Do we always handle situations the best way? Definitely not. Do we feel that the choices we make are what we feel is the best choice for you? Absolutely.
I think back to when I was young, and I'd get in arguments with grandma. I remember being upset at whatever she said/did to me and thinking "I'll never be that way when I have my kids. I'll be different." I remember thinking I'd be different. Fast forward to the present, and I'm a lot more like grandma than young me would like to admit.
I'll most always be mom first, friend second. You won't always like that, but believe me, you'll always need it. I'll be strict because discipline is a solid foundation. I'll be more closed minded than I'd like to be because the world is a scary place and I want to protect you from it. I'll be more demanding than you'd like because you have ALL of the potential and I won't let you fail. Failure is not an option. I'll be mean because tough love builds a backbone. You're gonna need to grow a real thick skin to make it out there, kiddos. I'll always be there, even when you don't want me to. I'll be nosy because I care.
Above all, I'll love you every minute of every day, forever.