Sorry, kids. This was overdue, and I should have done more e-mails or blogs over the last few months.
My beautiful Baby Bella,
It's kind of ironic I start with the word "sorry," I sometimes feel like I am always apologizing to you for something; whether it's missing a field trip, not being able to pick you up from school, or other things that come up, but this time it's a bigger deal.
This time I am apologizing to you for missing Christmas. It's even hard to type that. Bella, your mom has told you that I am a military man; well, I am. You are young now and might not realize certain things in life, but you are so smart (smarter than me, for sure) and you will. One thing is SACRIFICE. Bella, as sad as you are for me not being there with you, I am even sadder. I woke up this morning thinking about this: this is the first Christmas I will miss with you since you were born! The last time I was away for the holidays you and mom came to visit me in Virginia for Christmas, which was cool.
I mention sacrifice, because your dad does not know many things...the NAVY is one that I do know, and I would like to think I am good at it. Whenever I leave to go work for the Navy, those decisions are not easy for me and your MOM. I think the decisions I make are the right ones and are at the end of the day to benefit you and your sister. One of my biggest fears is that I am wrong on this matter, and you will never forgive me for this. I do this so that you have a better life, so that you have some the better things in life that I did not have. Don't get me wrong, I too, was blessed with my parents and had everything I needed, but I want more for you and your sister. So the sacrifice piece is sometimes I have to be away.
I wont promise you this is the last time I will leave, because I am not prepared to start breaking promises to you. What I will promise is that you, your mom and Ellie are always my priority in any decisions. This is another reason why you should love your mom a little more, kiss her more, and hug her more... without her, WE can't do this. She holds us together and is my best adviser on all things...( one day you will read between the lines kid, lol).
So from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry I am not there, but I will be there for New Year's, and we can have a special celebration!
My Ellie,
What can I say, my little sunshine. You are still too young to know what's going, but I know that everything I just told Bella will apply to you in time. The good thing for you is I am getting closer to the end of my NAVY career, so you may not see too much action. This is why you need to respect and listen to your big sister; she has been here a little longer than you!
Girls, I love you both so much! Everyday you make me a better man .
Love,
Dad